I feel like this is the gist of straight sex, and I still don’t get it.
alright, i am going to attempt to speak to you on the level and get over the fact that i am extremely offended by your logic (and seeming lack of knowledge and judgment pertaining to my own personal situation). so i am going to break it down to you that what you have presented here makes no sense. here’s why:
- you are implying that heterosexual allies, in standing up for the members of the LGBTQIA community, are making a statement that is just as bold or brave as someone who belongs within that community. this is false. the consequences of “coming out” as an ally and coming out as queer/trans/gay/lesbian/gender questioning/etc are most definitely not as unsafe. we still live in a society that praises the work of allies over the life of the persecuted - until something terrible happens. and these terrible things continue to happen.
- this reality is the reason why we need allies in the first place, because we have not yet been accepted into society as equals. i don’t understand how you can’t comprehend this. the fight for equality is still very real. of course we’re grateful for our allies but we would be that much more grateful if humanity would take that final step and accept those that should need no accepting.
I’m starting to give up on answering this as clearly as possible and right now all I want to say is how dare you pass judgment when you clearly do not have all of the facts and are ignoring the facts that are out there for you to digest.
I do not owe you an explanation as to why I live my life the way I do and I do not deserve to be told that the choice I have made isn’t doing much for my own cause. How dare you make that call when you aren’t the one living my life.
It is also VERY IMPORTANT TO NOTE: Nobody should ever come out if they do not feel it’s safe to do so. Self preservation is a full time occupation and for me to have made the personal choice to stay in the closet in some capacity does not mean that I have chosen to take a victim’s way out and further my own pain, therefore furthering the pain of others or pacifying those who do not approve.
I made this choice after doing a lot of soul searching and enduring a lot of personal pain that was sometimes life-threatening. It has been 10 years now since I have realized, at the age of 19, that I am not heterosexual. I have not known all my life, I had no idea that I could be until I was older, and I often wonder what choice I would have made if I had known at a much younger age.
The fact remains that this is where I am right now, at this time of my life and there are so many things that you don’t know or have access to because you aren’t living it. Both my girlfriend and myself use the term “roommate” in reference to each other when it comes to our families. If anything, she is more protective of coming out than I am. She has her reasons and I understand them, having grown up in a religious family with similar “christian values.”
It is also important to note that I am out to selective members of my family and the people who do not know do not know for two specific reasons. My grandfather doesn’t know because it’s not something that he would understand. He is nearly 92 years old and there are some people out there that will never accept it. I love him very much, I cherish who he is and all he has done for me, and, given the very fucked up dynamic that my family suffers from, there are already enough obstacles between the two of us that keep us from having the kind of relationship I want with him at this point in my life and in his. I don’t have the freedom to see him as much as I wish to, and he doesn’t exist in my daily life in the capacity that I wish he could. Which brings me to the second person who does not know: my mother. My mother, or - as I like to refer to her as - my egg donor, is abusive. She wasn’t very present (my grandparents raised me, if you didn’t know) but, when she was, she was violent, verbally abusive, emotionally abusive, she exposed me to unsafe situations and people including but not limited to drug use, and she has resented my existence since conception. She has said numerous times that she wishes I had never been born, that she had aborted me, that I was worthless, the worst thing that ever happened to her, that I ruined her life, and that I was a waste of human flesh.
Why should I share my truth with someone who doesn’t respect me? More importantly, why should I share my precious truth with someone who does not make me feel safe and would use this information against me?
My cousins know, my uncle knows, his ex-wife (who is a lesbian) and her partner know, their mom’s mom knows, and that is all that matters to me. They are accepting of this, they love Jodie, they invite her to family dinners and holidays, and most importantly they know how delicate a balance it is while interacting in front of my grandfather. A few times my aunt has slipped, referring to Jodie as “my girl” too loudly but that’s because she isn’t the most tactful person in the world. Also, at this point, I know deep down that my grandfather probably knows and it’s best to silently acknowledge than confront him with information that would make us both uncomfortable. If you cannot respect that, then I don’t know what to tell you.
Not everything is black and white. (insert rainbow joke here)
I also want to stress to you that you have chosen to remain anonymous. Why? You are bringing up a topic in such a way that is extremely offensive and given the fact that you don’t feel like you can attach your name to it, you do not want to be responsible for the reaction my response gives. I thought about making a video as a response just to remind you that I am a human being. I am alive. I am very real and these are very real circumstances that I have to deal with— that we have to deal with, as a couple.
Her parents are visiting in a couple weeks and they will likely be staying here in the guest bedroom of the home we rent from. We stay with a family that accepts us as a couple and I can’t help but panic and be very protective of things for the sake of her parents because I respect that she does not want to come out to her family yet - even if they have their own suspicions.
We will get there as a couple on our own time and that does not make us bad people, it does not make us hypocrites, it does not make us a detriment to the community. There are different ways to be brave. My problem is with people who flaunt this so-called braveness when they themselves do not live under the same set of circumstances or with the same fears.
I don’t understand how you can sit there and tell me to my face without using your own that a heterosexual ally and someone of the LGBTQIA community…. I mean, if you aren’t trying to bash or start an argument, why are you coming at me in this way where I have to defend the way I live my life? Not only are you completely illogical but you’re taunting like a bully and I cannot appreciate that, even if you are “curious.”
i get that you just want to make sure everyone is equal and you want to point out how some people are wrong with their social justice but cant we just agree that every person is a human being with rights and get back to whats really important, like the gen 3 remake and skyrim mythology
gather round kiddos, it’s the new anti-sjw comic, new from “piece-o-shit” industries.
or it’s just a comic put together by someone who is genuinely tired and/or stressed out from the large amount of constant social “call outs” on their dash when tumblr is literally their escape to get away from all their problems.
this isnt like the other passive aggressive comics, youre taking it a bit too personal.
Tumblr is like an MP3 player.
You put stuff on it that you like. Whether it be some obscure electronica, the newest pop single, or something folksy, what have you, its what YOU put on there. I must confess, I like a lot of the sjw stuff going on when it comes to tumblr…which is why my dash is full of it.
If all you care about is videogames…then follow video game blogs. Scan the blogs beforehand and see if that blogger posts sjw. Or anything else that annoys you. Then proceed to either follow them or not follow them. What is not going to solve anything is making comics that’ll just piss people off. Lets fight for our causes. Lets play our games. Lets draw and sing and dance and wank to whatever we please, because this is tumblr and there is something for everyone.